Rabbi Adler’s Egalitarian Brit Ahuvim Text
On the ____ of the week, the ______ day of _________, 57__ according to Jewish reckoning, ________ __, ______ according to secular reckoning, in the city of ________, ________ (Wedding Location), _______ _______ _______, called to the Torah as _______ ben/bat _______ and _______, and _______ _______ _______, called to the Torah as _______ ben/bat _______ and _______, confirm in the presence of witnesses a lovers’ covenant between them and declare a partnership to establish a household among the people of Israel.
The agreement into which _______ and _______ are entering is a holy covenant like the ancient covenants of our people, made in faithfulness and peace to stand forever. It is a covenant of protection and hope like the covenant God swore to Noah and his descendants, saying: “‘When the bow is in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures, all flesh that is on earth. That,’ God said to Noah, ‘shall be the sign of the covenant that I have established between me and all flesh’”. It is a covenant of distinction, like the covenant God made with Israel, saying: “You shall be My people, and I shall be your God.” It is a covenant of devotion, joining hearts like the covenant David and Jonathan made, as it is said: “And Jonathan’s soul was bound up with the soul of David. Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself.” It is a covenant of mutual lovingkindness like the wedding covenant between God and Zion, as it is said: “I will espouse you forever. I will espouse you with righteousness and justice and lovingkindness and compassion. I will espouse you in faithfulness and you shall know God.”
The following are the provisions of the lovers’ covenant into which _______ and _______ now enter:
1. They declare that they have chosen each other as companions, as our rabbis teach: Get yourself a companion. This teaches that a person should get a companion, to eat with, to drink with, to study Bible with, to study Mishnah with, to sleep with, to confide all one’s secrets, secrets of Torah and secrets of worldly things. 2. They declare that they are setting themselves apart for each other and will take no other lover. 3. They hereby assume all the rights and obligations that apply to family members: to attend, care, and provide for one another [and for any children with which they may be blessed] [and for__________ _____________ child/children of _________] 4. They commit themselves to a life of kindness and righteousness as a Jewish family and to work together toward the communal task of mending the world. 5. They pledge that one will help the other at the time of dying, by carrying out the last rational requests of the dying partner, protecting him/her from indignity or abandonment and by tender, faithful presence with the beloved until the end, fulfilling what has been written: "Set me as a seal upon your arm, for love is stronger than death."
To this covenant we affix our signatures.
Available in Hebrew & English for all couples
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550 words in English and 350 words in Hebrew
Language Options:
Hebrew & English
English Only (as a stand alone text or as an addition to a traditional text in Hebrew or Aramaic)
Hebrew Only
Size Recommendations
Hebrew & English: Extra Large
Hebrew Only or English Only: Large -
While frequently used interchangeably, a Brit Ahuvim or Lovers’ Covenant is distinct from a Brit Nissuin or Marriage Covenant. In a traditional wedding covenant, the groom “acquires” the bride after agreeing to provide the bride a symbolic amount of compensation should the marriage end for any reason. Not surprisingly, many couples object to the traditional language of acquisition, preferring language that defines partnership as a joining of equals. In an effort to “rewrite” our intimate relationships, Rabbi Rachel Adler, a feminist and Jewish scholar, wrote a new contract for Jewish couples looking for an egalitarian partnership.
Informed by a deep knowledge of Jewish Law, Rabbi Adler created a two part Jewish document that goes beyond the basic responsibilities of a Jewish spouses, and goes further to the define the relationship as a mutual responsibility that encompasses emotional labor. The first part of the contract defines the nature of the relationship and the second part, the Tennaim, defines the conditions of the partnership. Couples are encouraged to edit the conditions of their relationship, since Rabbi Adler’s intent is that different partnerships would need different conditions.
In Hebrew & English:
Progressive, Reform, LGBTQ+, and Interfaith couples with a strong Jewish identity.In English:
Interfaith couples (or anyone who doesn’t want a Hebrew ketubah text)
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Couples may change the wording of this text by changing words, deleting anything, using sections from other Ketubah Arts’ texts, or adding a few words.
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The couple
Witnesses (two is traditional but more may be added)
Officiant (multiple officiants may sign and line labels are customizable)
Signature line labels and number of lines may be customized to suit the couple’s preferences.
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Wedding Details
Secular wedding date and time
City & State (and country, if outside the USA) of wedding location
Names for the Couple
Full names for the couple in English, as you want them to appear
Hebrew names (see What is a Hebrew Name?)
- if not using a Hebrew name, decide whether you prefer secular names phonetically in Hebrew or the traditional Hebrew format (Name ben/bat Parent and Parent)
Parents’ names in English
First & Last Names for parents in English, if including them
How do I give you my information?
A Ketubah Text Order Form will pop up when you add a ketubah to your shopping cart.
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Yes! See a sample set of proofs.
